Guest post by Daniel Lichtman from Integrated Way
Self-confidence plays a pivotal role in one’s life. The confidence we boast helps us achieve goals and build a road to success.
However, statistics concerning self-satisfaction are quite alarming. According to stats in the UK:
- 60% of men have no confidence in the skills or talents they possess.
- 85% of women consider themselves ugly.
- 62% have no belief in their intelligence.
Low self-confidence is the core reason behind them all.
If you are in the same boat, you must be experiencing disturbing thoughts, anxiety, and low self-esteem. This constant feeling results in disbelief and negatively impacts your life.
Thankfully, improving self-confidence is possible with a few valuable tips. By setting goals, finding support, and making the right choices, we can give positive direction to our life.
But, let us first see what this term refers to and then dig out some proven ways of building self-confidence:
What is Self- Confidence?
Self-confidence refers to relying on your skills, capabilities, and judgments. It lets you feel worthy, irrespective of all the challenges and imperfections. Besides this, it gives you the courage to stand for yourself and stay positive.
People with a poor confidence level commonly stay in doubt about their abilities. They compare themselves with others and resort to feeling weak and discouraged. Plus, they are not expressive due to embarrassment.
For instance, a person with low self-confidence commonly has negative perceptions like:
- I cannot complete this project.
- I am unable to carry this relationship.
- I always end up with bad feedback.
And so much more.
How to Boost Self-Confidence?
Do not stress out if you are facing any of the above conditions. There are various ways of building self-confidence. Let us see what they are:
- Practice Positive Self Talk
Positive self-talk can combat negative messages in no time. Many of us repeatedly get the adverse outcomes of multiple situations in our minds. But, when we rehearse positive self-talk, we start adopting these emotions.
With time, this technique builds a connection between words and belief. It is also an essential concept of sports psychology. Research shows how athletes have improved their sports performance with regular positive self-talk.
Here are a few examples:
Negative Talk:
I cannot do this job
Positive Alternate:
I will learn to do this job
Negative Talk:
I am unable to carry this relationship
Positive Alternate:
I will seek advice from a relationship expert and continue this relation
Self-talk also gives us the confidence to improve relationships, especially when couples no longer find any interest in each other. In some scenarios, one partner becomes extremely dependent and takes advantage of the other, who acts as a caretaker.
However, when we practice self-talk and develop self-confidence, we get the courage to continue the relationship with a new spark. Also, we get the confidence to make decisions independently without depending upon the partner.
- Review Your Achievements
People with poor confidence are unable to believe in their abilities.
To cope up with this:
- Think about your former achievements. When you review these attainments, you will get the assurance of doing the same again.
- Jot down a list of your successes in a notebook.
- Write a short description of your route to success.
Psychotherapists also suggest doing this because it is strongly related to alleviating depression and boosting motivation. This act is a part of positive psychotherapy where patients recall their successful achievements and gain confidence in life.
- Avoid Toxic People
Try your best to get rid of toxic individuals in your life. Your thoughts are a reflection of the people with whom you surround yourself. These people only highlight your weaknesses to lift you down.
If you feel demotivated after meeting them, start maintaining distance. Also, learn some tactics to deal with these toxic personalities and replace your friend’s circle with supportive individuals. People with a positive mindset motivate others and build their confidence.
For instance, a toxic person will never encourage you to try again after a failure. Due to jealousy and envy, this person will always consider you incompetent. However, an individual with a positive outlook will motivate you to keep trying until you achieve success.
- Face Your Fears
When we face our fears, we experience that things are not as bad as we perceive. Thus, our self-confidence builds automatically.
For instance, we often don’t feel comfortable presenting a project to a large audience. But instead of running away from it, face and experience the challenge. People may be critical about your presentation, pinpoint your mistakes, or argue with your findings. Be prepared for everything and get ready to learn from this new endeavor.
With time, you will improve and gain confidence. After a few trials, analyze how many new things you have learned by facing your fear. It will give you the confidence to meet your next challenge with more courage.
- Never Try to Become a People Pleaser
Stay least concerned about what others feel about you. Everyone around you has a different personality, and you cannot please each of them. If you try to do so, you will build anxiety and unnecessary pressure. You alone cannot satisfy the entire world. So, live your life the way you want.
Furthermore, no one is perfect. So, it’s okay to make some mistakes, learn from them, and improve. You have the freedom to enjoy your life instead of thinking about others.
The day you realize this, you will feel a significant boost in your self-confidence.
Wrapping It Up
All of us struggle with low self-confidence at some stage in life. Fortunately, there are numerous ways to improve it. Learning these simple tips can help us experience a new change in life. Try to practice self-talk, avoid toxic individuals, and go through your achievements. Also, think less about others and do not get into the mess of pleasing everyone.
Staying well-dressed, eating healthy, and always keeping a smile on your face can also suppress your nervousness. You can even visit a psychotherapist as mental health issues can hinder your confidence even at an early stage.
Remember, life is short, and you can do everything if you want. So, start working on your confidence from today! Good luck!
Author Bio:
This article is written by Daniel Lichtman from Integrated Way. Daniel is a registered psychotherapist and certified transformational coach. He strives to help clients from all genres succeed in their personal and professional lives.